Waiting game..............

A strange week. It was so lovely to have all kids together for a few days. So much to talk about and to catch up on. Tuesday was our �joint hospital day� for Aiy�la and myself. Great news for Aiy�la, she no longer needs her morning injections and finally Dan and Kyla can start a �normal� new family life. The little girl is putting on weight and is simply a dream baby to have.

On Tuesday I had my pre op. Expecting the usual chaos and prepared to wait for hours... I was met by Daphne ( a translator for foreigners). I did not expect this, as for the last 11 months I have been navigating myself quite successfully through the different corridors and floors of hospital Parque St Antonio. What a pleasant unexpected surprise. She took me up to the third floor, helped to register me and I proceeded to have yet another blood test and ECG. From there she took me down for a chest x-ray ( where I have been many times before) and then back up to meet the anesthetist. So helpful, so friendly..... as they said good bye, I even had a friendly encouraging squeeze of my arm. Why is everyone suddenly so friendly? I can�t help but think, ' do they know something I don�t'? ' Do they think I am dying? This is the first time since coming into contact with any medical staff here, I felt that people cared.

I can see how ' on the edge I am', as gestures of kindness reduce me to tears. Out of all the days, think I could have handled the accustomed abrupt style better. I am not used to medical staff being 'nice'.

But rather then over analysing it, it was a welcome surprise.

Now this is behind me, the waiting game until the 17 April continues. I managed to have the operation moved forward by two days.

In the meantime I am increasing my CB doses on a daily basis, in order to get to re recommended Rick Simpson level of 1 ml. I have achieved it, but it does reduce my �thinking time� per day to  a few hours during the afternoon. I am not driving at the moment, which is a good thing.

I have also spent more time researching and trying to find out more information. An old friend of mine ( not in age, but years we have known each other J), who also had breast cancer, ( worse than me) which resulted in a double mastectomy, recommend a couple of hospitals in Cambridge. I have contacted them, to see if there was any chance of me flying over to see them and having the operation in Cambridge. Unfortunately they are fully booked and I would have to wait 3-4 weeks. This is something I can�t tolerate. It is torture feeling the tumor under my arm every day, wondering if it has �burst� and started to travel through my body. I simply have to get it out as soon as possible.
I have been asking the doctors in Cambridge what they know about �sealing the lymph nodes�, which I am told by my second surgeon Dr Scholz, is something she recommends and tends to do on operations like mine. The theory of it makes sense, but other than reading up on it on various websites, I don�t know anyone who has had this done.  Apparently it reduces the risk of Lymphedema.

Another friend of mine, has told me that there is a new type of test I could get done, in order to work out the exact type of cancer I have and the probability of it spreading as well as understanding the statistics with Chemo regarding the different types of cancer.