Stress?!.....

So I am not meant to be stressed...........that is clearly easier said than done.

Last Wednesday I have my 5th Herceptin session. According to the Oncologist, I need to take it 'very easy' ( what exactly does that mean?), apart from my heart expanding with the Herceptin ( how can I forget that the possible side effect of this stuff is heart failure!!), he is now waiting to see if my legs swell up, which apparently is normal. Can't wait!
I am starting to struggle walking up a flight of steps, which I am not happy about.

The last week I have had to work and by the time I get to the office, climb up to the first floor, I feel bushed. ( out of breath and dizzy).
I am seriously considering stopping Herceptin. Dead and cancer free is not an option as far as I am concerned. Many would argue that if I stop Herceptin, I am likely to die, a kind of a 'no-win' situation. I think the end of the day nobody knows and I need to decide what I am most comfortable with.

To kill these little cancer cells, that might or might not be floating around in my body, I have also increased my Tumeric intake and like the oil, I now put the powder into an empty capsule ( tablet), that way I can digest a larger amount without it tasting to awful.
The oil I am stepping up, and increasing the dosage, with the result that I sleep more, need at least an hour to wake up ( when I eventually do), the downside is that I then rush around for the afternoon with meetings, usually arriving late in the office.
The Quark and Lindseed oil, which I would gladly give to any client asking for compensation because the sun is not shining!!!, also tastes awful, but will all the seeds and fruit I add in, it becomes bearable.
The Bi-carbonate soda, I take a couple of times a week, as I tend to run out of time during the day, the lindseed oil 'breakfast' fills me up until bed time, and I run out of time to eat main meals, salads etc. In fact nothing really tastes the same. Where in the past I loved food and drink, now I eat because my stomach is empty, not because I want to enjoy a nice meal. I wonder if my taste buds will return.

The other challenge, now that it is getting cooler. I am freezing most of the time. The thought of walking around without my wig or woolly hat ( courtesy of Robbie!), make me shiver. How do bald men cope with the winter?? I am not coping...........