Waiting...............

Surreal is a word that sums up today.

Walking through Malaga, a place we love and know so well, is a strange feeling. I see so many new mums with babies in their prams, families with small toddlers all enjoying the beautiful sunshine. I feel strange walking amongst the crowds, and wish we could be carefree and simply be......

Kyla and Dan keep going to the hospital to see baby Aiy�la, who loves a cuddle with her mum, but won�t feed. Sucking seems to be to much hard work for her at the moment.The rest of us are not allowed in to see the baby.

Today I had my blood test for tomorrow, because unbelievably out of all the days, I am having Herceptin the same time my granddaughter is being operated on. I managed to change my appointment, to 09.00am, and hope to be out of there by 11.00, so I can get across town to the children�s hospital.  I just cant believe my luck, that out all the days, I have to have Herceptin. The oncologist refused to move my appointment by a week and I actually did not have the energy to argue with him.

Lindsay, who arrived last Thursday, the day Kyla went into labour ( she actually came out for my Birthday, which I happily cancelled), flew back this evening. It was wonderful having her here, she managed to make us laugh, when really we just wanted to cry. All of us are staying in our apartment in Malaga ( which was designed for 2 people, max 4, but definitely not 6), has actually been a �bonding and at times funny� experience. �Camping� springs to mind, but in times like this, all of us sticking together is proving to be therapeutic and comforting.

Gods knows if we will get some sleep tonight, Aiy�la�s operation starts at 08.00 and is likely to finish at 12.00, hopefully with a successful outcome.

Interestingly, I emailed Galves hospital, asking them for a meeting. So far I have not had a reply����..

More tomorrow. No Cannabis oil tonight, otherwise there is no chance of me getting up early. Instead we are drinking wine tonight and toasting our little granddaughter, who lying by herself in this huge baby unit.